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Going
off the title of this blog post you would think I was a right miserable old
bitch who only manages to crack a smile once every few months. That is NOT the
case, FYI. I’m pretty much always cheerful. I LOVE laughing. In fact I
whole-heartedly believe that laughter is the best medicine for anything, and fortunately
for me, I’ve got a really solid group of friends that make me laugh (almost)
every day.
However,
some days, when the tiniest thing goes wrong, it ruins my whole day. And I let it
ruin my whole day. I think this is partly due to anxiety and the fact I
overthink every tiny detail of everything in the world ever, but partly due to
me letting my negative mindset overrule the positive. I was on a shoot at work
last month, and we had the loveliest make-up artist in who was the most
positive, sweetest woman I have EVER met (soz mum) and she said that every day
when you wake up, you should say “I am loved, and I am blessed” out loud to
yourself in the mirror. At first, I laughed and was a bit like erm wtf, but I’m
going to give it a go and see how it changes (if at all) my life.
Monday
What
better day to start than a Monday! Not going to lie, it could have started
better as I had the most disrupted night’s sleep EVER. I went to sleep around
midnight, woke up at 3, then couldn’t get back to sleep till 6. I spent my time
valuably though- did you know you can watch Jaws the movie on a boat on the
River Thames?!?! My actual dream! Unfortunately, it’s on June 16th and
I’m at a day party that day, so I doubt I’ll be in a fit state to board a
moving vessel that evening. Anyway, I should have been in a bad mood, but I had
some amazing news yesterday that has given me a massive burst of motivation- I
can’t say what it is just yet, but it’s to do with my career, and if it works
out it’s going to be v. exciting.
I
also read in the paper this morning that an effective method to boost your
self-confidence and mood is to write down two compliments you have received
that day, so I’ve decided to apply that to this little positivity experiment
too…. Still waiting on the first one mind you 😐
I
didn’t want to let a weekend of eating junk dull my mood, (I get hung up about
my body on a daily basis) so I brought my gym kit and headed to a lunchtime
circuits class. (Exercise = endorphins and all that) I usually go after work,
but Love Island starts tonight, so I need to ensure I am home, settled and
ready for the clock to strike 21:00.
Monday,
done…So far so good! No bAd VibeZ. *insert peace finger symbol and crystal
ball emoji here*
Tuesday
Tuesday
is officially the worst day of the week. It’s not Monday, where everyone is
still kind of getting over the weekend, so it flies by pretty quick, and it’s
not Wednesday where at least you have the motivation that you’re already
halfway through the week. Not to mention I am still FUMES about last night’s Love
Island ending on a cliff-hanger! I NEED to know who Adam picks?!?!?! And I came
into work to an extremely rude and abrupt email which was just so unnecessary.
Anyway *thinks positive* I went to the gym AGAIN at lunch with my friend
Hattie (allllll about those endorphins!) I found out I won a load of Charlotte
Tilbury make-up and I’m going to an event with Pandora at the swanky Ivy hotel
tonight. Pro’s are definitely outweighing the cons here.
Compliments:
non. AGAIN. In fact, when I came out the gym, I bumped into a colleague and she
didn’t even recognise me. Brill. Oh actually, a boy sent me the heart eyes
emoji on Bumble.. does that count?
Wednesday
So,
I probably had one (or ten) glasses of champagne too many at the Pandora event
last night, but it was SO GOOD! We made flower crows and ate boujee canapes and
talked and laughed and it was just a fabulous event- thank you for having me
Pandora! (So gutted because I took so many gorgeous photos of the room and the table but I can't get them back now because I lost my phone before I got chance to upload this blog post.) I woke up thinking it was Friday. Brill. BUT my housemate Rach (who
also got v. drunk last night) was really late for work which meant we could
walk to the tube together hehe. (I am so needy)
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Had
a little stroll in the sun at lunchtime and rang one of my best friends who has
just moved to London! Made plans to see her and another friend next Wednesday
for dinner and drinks. Having stuff to look forward to creates an instant good
mood, right?! Plus, I love drinking on school nights. Not so much the next day.
But #YOLO.
Compliments:
I got the SWEETEST comment on a photo I uploaded on Instagram from the event
last night. It was from a fellow bloggers mum, and it said “Lovely to meet you
last night sweetie. You’re a great girl, funny and beautiful.” MY HEART!
Oh,
and Hayley told me she liked my top. Oh, and Hattie said my skin was glowy.
Thursday
I
was buzzing all day today because I had plans with my friend Andrew after work,
and he is the FUNNEST person ever. The power of positive thinking got me
through this whole day because I was gagging for an XL large vino. It was such
a fun night too, we met in Soho, went to a few pubs (£16 bottles of wine, FYI)
then had a feast in Chinatown (can’t actually remember eating this) then ended
up in our FAVOURITE place… the Yard. It’s a gay bar in Soho and we always end
up meeting really fun people in there. I actually got a chippy on my way home
which really highlights how shocking my diet has been this week. Oh well.
Compliments:
I got an email from one of the other bloggers from the Pandora event- the lovely Charlotte. She said sitting next to me was probably the funnest time she's ever had at an event! MY HEART! (AGAIN!) As for compliment number 2 though... Shall I make something up? Someone passed out on the tube because of my
overwhelming beauty????? Would you believe me?
Friday
The
phrase ‘Happy Friday!’ KILLS me. But it is. And I am POSITIVEEEEE so I won’t
cringe at hearing it 500 times today. Also. I’m going on a date tonight. So,
I’m not gonna bother writing down my compliments cos I’m probably gonna get 5
million. Well. I better. Or there won’t be a date number 2 I'll tell ya THAT.
(If you're reading this then plz will you send a bouquet of roses to my office
next week??? Thanks.)
Saturday
So,
I lost my phone in the pub so my alarm didn’t go off and I missed my train to
Hereford where I was supposed to be spending the weekend with my brother and my
parents soooooo….. Not only am I the world’s worst daughter, but I am a social
recluse as well. Oh, and it wasn’t insured. So I had to buy another one. But
what's £650 between friends, hey? *Wipes sweat from brow* ANYWAY. I had such a
cute night hehehehe (TBC...) Not one to waste a preciousSaturday
night, I met my friends in Shoreditch and had some (kinda) civilised drinks.
Didn’t get a takeaway, didn’t have a cigarette, and was at home in bed (well,
Polly’s bed) at a decent time. Fabulous evening!
Sunday
I
loveeeeee a lazy Sunday. I got home around 2ish, then lazed in bed catching up
on all my favourite reality TV shows (Love Island and Real Housewives of
Atlanta) made something actually different for lunch (I usually have the same
stir-fried tofu/chicken salad/scrambled eggs) for every meal so that was VERY
exciting. Then I watched Love Island with my housemates at 9. Perfect Sunday!
So,
what has making a special effort to think positively taught me? As someone who
lets the tiniest thing bother them, it made an, albeit subtle, improvement to
my anxiety level. It’s made me focus on the good things people say to me and
that’s an instant mood booster. It’s also made me really think about just
slowing down and enjoying what I’m doing that day, as opposed having some
really exciting plans on Saturday and therefore hating every day that week
until it reaches Saturday. I’m not at the stage where I am waking up and giving
myself the “I am loved and I am blessed” pep talk, but the power of positive
thinking really has made a difference!
What
resting bitch face?
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